dont know what time it is. dont particularly care. just logged online cause i am bored and stoned and im having a nice cigarette. this is nice.
heater cranking.
all warm and comfy
...
wish i had some more weed tho... mm
sister just went out with friends.. dunno where to. think the mother isnt liking the fact that her children have grown up.
all well. she has her husband and his son.. who doesnt seem to require any kind of social life...
i dunno. but i just feel so lost in this world. i need some money. money really does rule the world. i dont feel complete without it.. and yet i feel so disgusted at that thort.
we really have created a fucked up world for ourselves.
i used to have dreams of wanting to achieve things.. and now all i seem to dream of is getting fucked up and materialistic bull shit. i just wanna hook up a factory job.. pull in the cash and start spending. finally move out into a place of my own where i can have a bong sitting next to the bed and not care about it. or whatever.
i wanna go to uni as well...
i dunno. i guess i have time for all that.
but i should be thinking about it now
i mite go check in with an old english teacher..i have her number somewhere.. she sms'd me last week i think it was.. but i been to drug fucked to do anything about it. it may have even been more than a week ago. i dont know how to find out tho.. smashing your phone has its consequences. but i guess i did smash it because of drugs. i hadnt done anything for a few days and i wasnt getting frustrated and angry and edgy and paranoid and weird. couldnt concentrate and when i did it annoyed me.. so i began smashing things. it was fun at the time. although i really did need my stereo. haha. i do some stupid things at times.
I spoke to a girl from my old school the other night. may have even been last nite? not sure. But i got some phone numbers off her. Maybe i can hook into some better drugs now? although this weekend should be good. LSD in the out back. a friends friend just got this awesome house on heapsa land. HUSH HUSH THOUGH. cant give too much out. haha. yeah.
well i really need my hair cut. its been ages since ive cut it myself and i have a gift voucher at a friends salon.. i need to get it done already.
and i think im rambling.. i think this whole entry has been a ramble. im searching for something interesting to talk about here and continually finding nothing.
i need to get cashed up. wanna buy a couple grams of meth and have a good time with it.
oooPS. im supposed to be stopping all this shit. next monday seems good enough to start. although ive been saying that for over a year now. maybe this has evolved into something i cant... wait wait wait now. none of that bull shit. gtg cause im peekin out.
f�n
9:06 p.m. - 2005-03-26
Recent entries:
2 whole decades! - 2022-08-162 whole decades!
understand that you are alive - 2007-03-12understand that you are alive
do yo love it? harder.. and faster? - 2006-04-26do yo love it? harder.. and faster?
short lived and out of focus - 2006-02-02short lived and out of focus
pierced and black - 2006-02-01pierced and black
My profile
Archives
Notes
Diaryland
Random
RSS
others:
aurian
beergut
friday13th
agitated
kinda-boring
bloodyscars
abusemyheart